There are a few things I'd like to see: A debate between George W. Bush and Sadam Hussein. A fistfight between Osama bin Laden and Colin Powell. The porn movie starring the Bush girls and Osama. It takes place at the gym. All of them are on exercycles, Osama in the center. The girls are hot. They pretend to be reaching for each others water or tape, "accidently" touching Osama in the process....They take him home. Maybe there they are joined by the First Lady, I don't know. That's why I need to see it, so I know how it ends. Is there Al Qaeda porn?

Just like in the old days, when they evaluated your personality by measuring bone structure and such....except now it is to sell you a special diet. What type are you?

I just decided that people who are willing to spend enourmous amounts on keeping their heads frozen after they are dead are most likely the most undeserving of being brought back, If not for reasons of stupidity then for reasons of selfishness. I can't quite explain what made me think of that. Maybe the weather.

Seeking sponsors:
To promote, support and publish the book "Translucent Food for Health And Pleasure". This revolutionary work is a surefire hit. Interested parties should contact kinograf.

When taking steroid nose spray, one is supposed to avoid measles and chickenpox. Not exactly a huge change in my daily routine. But what about smallpox?

I'm having severe sinus trouble, it seems to result in constipation of the brain, quite uncomfortable. But it sure is a curious thing: You feel absolutely awful, glands swollen, skin puffy and dry, eyes burning with fever and two feverish red spots on your usually pale cheeks. Your head an amorphous swollen mass on a broken body. And everyone is amazed at how well you look.

Elegy to my ex-wife

I offered you my heart, you ripped it out of my chest and threw it to the ground.
That was not funny.
You turned around to walk away. You stepped on broken heart slime,
slipped, fell and broke your neck.
That was funny.

Author's note: I don't have an ex-wife.

Long before there was any George Bush, long before there even was a Sadam, there was a noble German by the name of Karl May who at length discussed his adventures in the Orient, the Arab culture, the dangers, the Muslim....
If only he were here today, I am certain he'd have something to say about the situation.

Kara Ben Nemsi

By the way: The deadline for the LMCC residency is coming up Mrch 7th. This year it will be not in the World Trade Center, but the Woolworth Building.
Better apply while it's standing!

Plastic surgery: What is the difference between Orlan and Michael Jackson?

Read Growth of the Soil by Knut Hamsun. No wonder the world is in the condition it is in now, man has become blinded by the Yanky and the lust for money and ore and has neglected to serve his purpose as a worker on the soil that nurtures him. People kill their babies frequently and a man can only make sure to have his female help for the summer if he gets her pregnant. The ones that go to the cities become weak and corrupted and stay poor in the end because they had neglected the soil. It's really fun to read, every 5 chapters or so a guy named Geissler shows up and is god-like. No wonder the recession is upon us, forget about a new World Trade Center, have it be a cornfield to feed the workers! Strange, it seems to be a real classic novel, but nobody's ever heard of it.